No... honestly.... they are not mine.......

For those that know me well, you will already know of my ability to lose my wallet on a depressingly frequent basis. You may not, however, be aware of my propensity for embarrassing moments. Maybe my 3rd grade teacher was right when she said I would need a nursemaid, or at least someone who could help me extricate myself from the messes I can get myself into.

For instance, my son left for his first day of 4th grade yesterday and left his swim suit and towel in the dryer. How inconsiderate of me to wash and dry his clothes and forget to put them in his school bag. The wheel has almost come round full circle as I pull everything out of the dryer and prepare to head into school to drop the offending articles off at his new class.



As I get out of the car, I find a pair of my wife's panties stuck to the towel. God bless static electricity.

As I am also in a hurry, I stuff  the red silk underwear into my short's pocket.



I call into the office and get my security clearance, together with my visitor badge and hide the AK45 in the towel and head off upstairs to his new classroom.

So far, so good.

I knock politely on the door and I am waved in by his new teacher. I tell her I have just dropped in to bring his swim suit. We exchange polite conversation and I hear how delighted she is to have Legend Jr in her class this year and then I turn to leave. I pull my car keys out of my pocket and out pops a pair of, well, let's just say they wouldn't pass for a handkerchief. She looks at the floor, then at me, then back to the floor again as I retrieve the offending article.

"I do rather like the color red," I said, as I opened the door and beat a hasty retreat back to the office to sign out. I did catch a glimpse of her doing a very good impression of a Guppy with a speech impediment just before the door closed.

And so another good start to the school year unfolds.

I think I will keep my distance for a while. Maybe until High School